6-16-01 Sa 9:12 AM

It has been almost six hours since I wrote the date and time. It's now 2:58 PM. I've had an aversion to doing this. Like a true, physical aversion. A loathing. Now, I just don't care, which is slightly better. I'm still stuck in some horrible overwhelming apathy and dissatisfaction. I contaminate my family with these feelings. ~~~~~

I've been feeling old and tired. When I got to school yesterday, one of my little eight-year-olds said, "Teacher, you look different."     "What do you mean?" I asked.     "You look old and tired," she said.

I had a hard time sleeping. I awoke at three in the morning with a painful headache. I had promised Rochelle we would go up to happy hour to celebrate her A in algebra at SMC. I'd had some whiskeys and beers. Thus, the horrible headache at three in the morning. It became four o'clock, then five. I took some Tylenol and Alka-Seltzer and smoked some pot and tried jerking off and lying on the couch. I guess I feel asleep around six and got up for work around seven. We had the softball game between the fifth graders and the teachers today. I pitched and homered. 

Getoff and Estella came over to watch the Lakers win another NBA championship. It was underwhelming and anticlimactic. We made ribs and chicken wings. Watched "Life of Brian" after the game. It was all boring. I went and got my hair cut short. I'm thinking of shaving it. I saw an old man walking on the street; framed he was--that is, he was walking with his head through a picture frame; it hung around his neck.

[color photograph "Mt. Hood, from a train, 1997]