6-12-01 Tu 12:04 PM

Guess where I am? That's right; the shitter at Wilshire Hill. Whatever. What the hell? When did I last write? I don't remember. It must have been a fifteen-minutes on the laptop here at school yesterday. I haven't been feeling so good. I hate my place in life.  Hate the evil that seems to have the world in its grasp. The government is evil. I want to rescue my idiot brother and spirit my loved ones away to some island uncontrolled by the forces of evil. McVeigh was executed yesterday. When the government murders people, it's called justice. Bush, proof that the world is controlled by the forces of evil, had this thoughtful piece of idiocy to share: "Today, every living person who was hurt by the evil done in Oklahoma City can rest in the knowledge there has been a reckoning." I'd like to see some brave, good person flush that turd once and for all. I was turning the globe on my desk, turning and turning, trying find where in the world is there some sanctuary to raise my daughter. ~~~~Augh.

I never went to Hoover yesterday. Perhaps it is my own lack of integrity that invites evil unto the world. ~~~But the baby was there, and we love each other. Rochelle took a nap. She's always tired. Pregant? Yikes. My mother came over to dote on the baby. USC lost to Miami. I didn't feel like anything. I didn't read or write. I watched "Six of a Kind" with W. C. Fields, George Burns, and Gracie Allen. Fields' pool stick bit got to me. I put the baby to bed at seven. My mom left. Rochelle came home, and we went to bed. I neither drank nor smoked nor had any desire to do so. It was hard to get up this morning. I'm tired, too. Pregnant? Ugh. Rode my bike to work. I need some coffee. We did Maricruz's IEP in Yale's office. I translated. I struggle to care or to appear to care. I do care, but I feel defeated. In madness you dwell. I need a nap. I pored over the classifieds searching for an escape. Some other job. I could teach in Japan. What? I'll nap when I get home. Make a tape for my dad. Typed a newsletter for Hoover. I ate pizza at lunch.